Finally, the weekend.

Luckily for me, I didn't have to show up to the office today. Being a sales rep means I get to go all over the damn place and spend a lot of time sitting in LA traffic cursing my existence. Today wasn't all that bad though, I went to a mini-convention maybe 3 miles from my house which means instead of waking up at 5:45 and starting my routine, which you have all seen(and by" you" I mean Ski, my mom, and my sister) I got to sleep til damn near 7. That's a fucking accomplishment. How sad my life has become.

3 or 4 years ago waking up at 7 was not a possibility unless it was a football Saturday and I had important business[drinking] to attend to. I used to sleep til 10 at a minimum to make it to my noon class, and even then there was no guarantee I would make it, which would explain why I was constantly on academic probation from the fine establishment also known as Lambda Chi Alpha Fraternity. Now if I sleep til 7 or 7:30 I wake up and feel like I've slept til noon. It's fucked up. What's going on with my body and my brain? Even if I try to sleep in my body naturally wakes me up thus shooting all chances of sleeping in squarely in the ass.

Anyway, let's get back on topic: me not being in the office today. So being out of the office let's me avoid one thing I hate; STANDARD OFFICE SMALL TALK. You probably know what I mean by this. You can almost tell what certain people you work with are going to say to you in the morning just by what day it is.

Monday - Standard Questions: How was your weekend? Did your team win? etc. Standard Statements. My weekend was good, TOO SHORT THOUGH ROFL!!!! My team won or lost goddammit they suck balls. I can't wait til Friday. My life sucks. I need more coffee to handle this shit, etc.

Tuesday - HEY, at least it's not Monday!! LOL HIGH FIVE!

Wednesday - IT'S HUMP DAY/HAPPY HUMP DAY! These statements seem ironic, and I looove irony. Everyone that says something about hump day has the same perverted thought in their head "ha, you just said hump!". Fact of the matter is, everyone I work with is married and has kids so NO day is ever hump day for them. Literally.

Thursday - OMFG I am so glad tomorrow is Friday, I need more coffee to make it through this shit.

FRIDAY - WOO Weekend, bla bla bla let's not do any work today at all because I checked out as soon as I parked my car in the garage this morning! What are your weekend plans? Who does your team play? You Golf?

How many times during a 5 day work week do these people say the word "Friday"? Friday is the most popular word in every office everywhere. No wonder we're so fucked and the recession went on/is going on for so long. Everyone is a moron.

I hate Office small talk for another reason: no one knows shit about you. They don't care what your responses are, and they won't remember any of them. I can't tell you how many times I've been over that fact that I am from Ohio with people I work with. "Ohio??" Yes, Ohio. And no I do not like country music, did not live on a farm or any other retarded vision of Ohioans you have in your head. People in California are so fucking dumb when it comes to anything outside of their bubble. To them there California, some dry hot places, some cold places, farmers, hicks and NYC. That's it. That's what America looks like to them.

Anyways, I'm fucking out. I have football to watch. Go WVU(fuck Cincituckey), and Go Bucks!

Almost forgot - thanks to everyone at 11w and the BBC for checking this out. Your comments and readership are appreciated.